Dog-gone funny

Speaking of butt-sniffing behaviors best left "behind", the following joke (thanks, Auntie Jan) was passed on to me via e-mail. It's actually funny!

The Purina Diet

I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dogs and was in
line to check out. A ditzy woman behind me asked if I had a dog........ Duh!

I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting The
Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the
hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in
both arms.

Her eyes about bugged out of her head. I went on and on with the bogus
diet story and she was totally buying it . I told her that it was an easy,
inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to load your pockets or purse
with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.
The package said the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it
again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by
now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind the ditz.
Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was
that why I ended up in the hospital. I said no.....I'd been sitting in the
street licking my butt when a car hit me.

I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.