A Burr In The Butt-Fluff

Early this morning I took the dogs and headed down to my favorite state park for a walk around Pike Island.  When I arrived, there was only one other car in the parking lot.  We headed off in to the fog and were about 1/2 way up one side of the island when Belle sat down and refused to get up.  Normally when she does this, it's usually just a burr in her butt-fluff.  I checked her over, found she was burr-less, but still she wouldn't budge.  Until I turned around and started heading back the other way.  Up she popped and happily moved forward - as long as it was opposite the direction we'd been going.  After trying to turn her and continue on our original path she immediately sat and refused to budge.  By now her behavior was starting to give me the creeps.  We turned around again, and again, she happily walked at heel.  Not far from where we were there is a cut-thru across the island.  I took her down that path and she was her usual self, doing her deer prance and dance every time we passed one of the many that make up the herd in the park.  When we got to the other side of the island, I took a right instead of the left that would take us back to the parking lot.  We got about a 1/4 of a mile before she sat.  No amount of coaxing would get her to move forward.  I turned us all around and headed back to the car.

I don't know why Belle sat like that, and refused to move forward.  For all I know, she was just hungry and knew that if we continued the way I wanted to go, breakfast would be delayed interminably.   But she was clearly trying to tell me something she felt I needed to know.   Despite my initial thought, "let's go, here", it also occurred to me she has other senses that are keener than mine.  With that in mind it seemed wisest to listen to her "sit" and go home. 

Belle's clear communication about where she would and wouldn't go got me thinking.   How often do we ignore the stubborn "sits" in our lives because we think we know more or know better which path is right for us?

Juxtapose or Just Suppose?

In an e-mail this week, our HP instructor for the Monday class gave an excellent explanation of the difference between click and treat and luring the puppy to perform a certain cue. Her point was primarily that treats as a lure are short-term solution that ultimately inhibits our long term goal of encouraging our dogs to offer behaviors to solve problems to earn their reward. In short, to learn how to learn.

Those of you that have read my previous posts know that this topic is near and dear to my heart as well - particularly as it translates to raising our human children. Yesterday's op-ed piece on raising our collective I.Q.'s by Pulitzer Prize winning editorialist, Nicholas D. Kristof illustrates the applicability of the Helping Paws method for all - human or other. Mr. Kristof summarizes the research of Professor Nisbett on how to raise how collective I.Q.'s as follows:

Professor Nisbett provides suggestions for transforming your own urchins into geniuses — praise effort more than achievement, teach delayed gratification, limit reprimands and use praise to stimulate curiosity — but focuses on how to raise America’s collective I.Q. That’s important, because while I.Q. doesn’t measure pure intellect — we’re not certain exactly what it does measure — differences do matter, and a higher I.Q. correlates to greater success in life.

I do disagree with Kristof's conclusion that more intensive early-childhood education programs are the answer as long as the focus of that intent remains on the child. To be truly successful, the intensive education must be directed on the most important teacher any child will ever have - its' parent.

The gift returned...

Today, more gifts will be returned than on any other day of the year. The reasons are many; too small, too big, too many, too too. The return of a gift rarely evokes an emotional response. It's simply a transaction. But how does one accept the return of a gift that was crafted with love and time and effort. A gift that brought as much joy to the giver as it did to the receiver, yet still wasn't the right gift?

It is with sorrow that I share the news that Belle has earned a career change within Helping Paws. Her exceptional skills - due largely to her intelligence and playfulness - were outdone by her occasional willful independence. Willfulness is not necessarily a bad thing - but Belle's independent expression put her partner's safety at risk. That is a fatal error for a service dog. With much heartache felt by all, Belle was given a new role; Helping Paws Demonstration Dog. It's a role she has performed with aplomb during her training years and one in which all expect her to excel given her penchant for playing to the crowd.

It is with joy that I also share the news that I will be Belle's new partner in this venture. To answer the question posed earlier in the post, I accept this returned gift with humility, gratitude, and a profound admiration for the courage and love it must have taken for Jesse to return her to a life for which she is better suited. And I pray that Jesse's next partner will be a perfect match.

Insight on Instep

Last week I started back to class. Not with a dog, but as a gopher. I knock on doors to nowhere, dole out retrievables, and smile nonstop watching these incredible dogs and their selfless trainers.

Some years ago I attended a wedding polka. Not knowing the dance steps, I sat on the sidelines mesmerized by the fluid movement of the dancers to each foreign call. Watching the dogs as Eileen called M & M positions (so-called because the dog's movement from position to position creates an M), the memory was revived. Instead of swirling skirts, swirling tails. But the gracefulness and synchronicity were the same. Each partner in step with the other.

And I marveled again at the beauty and intricacy of the dance.

Surprised by Joy, Part II

My thanks to the great comments left on the last post. I'd like to address a thought touched on in each comment - how sad it must be to see Belle move on.

Let me put it this way. If I had a tail it would not have stopped wagging.

At our foster folk celebration luncheon right after we dropped off the dogs for the last time, one of the first questions asked by Bella's (Belle's sister) foster mom, was if anyone else's dog had completely quit working for them. She related how they
First day of Team Training. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . hadn't been able to get Bella to
respond to virtually any request since the previous week-end. A chorus of "me too's" rang out around the table.

As we talked, it became apparent to all of us that as our dogs skill grew they also began to realize that we didn't need their help. Their experience with their new partners cemented that realization. It also underscored what I've increasingly felt about my relationship with Belle - that she had outgrown me.

Seeing her with Jesse, hearing how the day's training went, knowing what it must be like for both to discover the wonder of each other makes me feel pure joy. The tremendous joy that can only come from doing something previously thought undoable.

Belle's skills and enthusiasm will be put to work every day. She will be much loved and will give much love to her new partner. She couldn't have a more wonderful life. And that makes me really happy.

2009 Tail Waggin' Dinner

The evening celebrated the 20th Anniversary of Helping Paws. Jenny Peterson was the keynote speaker. The theme for the night was how Helping Paws dogs touch the lives of others; from the volunteers and foster homes to the graduates who receive them - and as one slide so aptly put, "and everyone in between".

Jenny is in a unique position to tell the story of Helping Paws. Her service resume includes:

• First Executive Director of Helping Paws
• Co-developer along with Eileen Bohn of the training manual used by all foster homes
• Former Board member

Finally, Jenny is the recipient of three Helping Paws service dogs including Alpha (shown above)*, the first dog trained and placed by Helping Paws.

Her warm, touching, and sometimes emotional speech told the story of this incredible dog. As Jenny noted, the hardest part of having a service dog is that they don't live as long as their human partners. Yet Alpha left a legacy of service that continues to touch each and every person with the privilege of witnessing or working with a Helping Paws service dog. Alpha taught Eileen and Jenny how to train the fosters who would work with the service dogs to come. A born ham, his demonstration skills made public outreach a breeze. He, with Jenny and Eileen alongside, paved the way for those who would follow.

Last night, his followers enjoyed a full house, a full stomach, a full heart, and an empty wallet. Like any true Alpha, he's still leading us well on the golden path he first walked.

*Alpha - photo courtesy Jenny Peterson

Snuggle

One of the cues we teach our dogs is "Snuggle". When given the cue, the dog rests its head on your shoulder. For a person with quadriplegia - this cue gives them the chance to feel their dog. It's an incredible cue.

An interesting thing happened during the meet and greet session between State Fair Demonstrations last week-end. A young man and his personal attendant came up to talk with me and to greet Belle. Belle's reaction was both instantaneous and spontaneous - she wanted to greet this man in the worst way. Until then, Belle had been a model of propriety with everyone she met. She politely offered a paw for shake, and if I released her, she would gently step next to them to get a head scritch. With this young man, however, Belle was beside herself. I asked the young man if it would be okay for Belle to do a rise on his lap and when he replied, "oh, yes!", Belle happily rose and then, unexpectedly laid her head right on his shoulder. No cue for snuggle - she just rested her head right next to his cheek and stayed there for a very long moment. Then she kissed him on the cheek. Those that were watching audibly groaned at the touching moment. It was an amazing experience to observe.

In the days since the Fair, I've related this story several times. Each time I've told it, I've been asked, "why do you think she did that?" I still don't have an answer. Although Belle has worked with several HP graduates, none of our training is specifically designed to teach the dog to single out individuals in wheelchairs for this type of greeting - yet Belle somehow knew just what to do - and how to connect best with this young man. As her foster mom - it was such a proud moment to see what she could sense and then give so freely. I know what you're thinking, "she's a golden retriever - that's what they do". Still, this was different than her typical happy greeting behavior. She really wanted to give that man a snuggle - and she doesn't typically (at least with me) offer snuggle except on cue.

I'll never know what prompted her incredible response. I'm just so glad I could witness it.

Access

Access. Accessibility. Accessing. The word access in all of its forms can mean many things, but underlying them all is the perception of rights. To grant access; to make accessible; to be accessible - all these forms imply permission required. Imply power.

A friend of mine sent me a link to the Safe and Sound Blog maintained by author and guide dog user Beth Finke. The blog post she thought I'd be interested in was titled, "Are Little Kids Old Enough to Use Service Dogs?" As I read the story of how a four year old with autism and his service dog were denied entrance to his school bus and his school, several thoughts came to mind that weren't addressed by the article - but are specifically identified as critical within the ADA access laws for determination of whether the school was justified in barring the dog; would the dog be accompanied at school by a responsible adult? Would the presence of the dog fundamentally alter the activities at the school? Would the dog pose a threat to the health and safety of others?

The ADA laws were crafted to insure public access to all who require the assistance of service animals. The exceptions to the law are very narrow precisely to prevent the situation that occurred at the school. Because the original article was silent on the salient facts, the reader is left to use personal opinion to decide either for or against the schools decision. And that's the problem with the original story and the blog post - feelings and personal opinion don't count in these decisions - not when it comes to access rights for service animals. Why? Because the authors of the law know how easy it is for those that serve the public to discriminate against those with special needs. To prevent access to those who can't live safely without assistance, canine or other.

Whether the helper dog user is blind, deaf, physically or developmentally challenged - the question remains the same - do they have the same rights as those that don't have these challenges? The law is clear. They do.

Mindful or Mind Full

In addition to starting a new job two weeks ago, I'm taking a five day class called TTouch for Companion Animals.

I was introduced to the Tellington Touch method by Helping Paws folks. Some of the basic touches are taught to us as part of our training. About six weeks ago, Helping Paws strongly encouraged the foster homes, the graduates and other volunteers to attend an hour and half demonstration by Linda Tellington-Jones. The Golden Valley Humane Society was hosting Linda and HP staff thought we could learn a lot about the method straight from the horses mouth, as it were. That last phrase was not meant to be flip. Linda herself, learned the method from a horse - specifically, from working around the horse's head and mouth.

The method itself is extremely simple - but the concept behind it, mindfulness and respect, is much more difficult than it seems, at least for me. Identifying what it means to be aware of the animal, what it is feeling, how to connect with the place the animal is in and using touch to gently alter that state. "Being mindful" is a phrase I've heard so often this week. Long after I've learned all the touches; "chimp", "abalone", "python", and "clouded leopard", to name just a few, I have a feeling I'll still be working on just what it means to be "mindful".

Below is YouTube video of Linda demonstrating her method with a horse.

Success Is Measured Many Ways

Belle and I went back to class last night after a three week hiatus for Team Training. From the excellent work Belle did, I could tell she missed class as much as I did.

I felt a cornucopia of emotions as I looked around the class; joy at seeing old friends again, bittersweet grief at missing our classmates who graduated last Friday, and finally anticipation of the fun to be had with the new members of Big Dog Class.

Surprisingly, I felt one more emotion - a very strong sense of accomplishment.

That statement might sound odd given that Belle should have been one of the graduates last week. Yet if there was ever any doubt that the decision to have Belle graduate in the fall was in error, Belle put them immediately to rest when she demonstrated her greetings skills upon arrival at graduation.

Despite the overly enthusiastic greetings, Belle has come so far since December. For example, her really, reliable recall. Three times these past few weeks, I accidently left the inside door open. Belle took advantage and immediately let herself outside (she knows how to open the storm door in her sleep). In the past, this would have meant the start of the game, "Nah, nah, na boo-boo, I'm outside and you can't catch me". I hate that game. Except this time she didn't play it - not once! When I told her "Belle, Come"! She immediately came to me - all three times! She's even coming to me at the tennis courts even when she knows that this time "come" means go - leaving her favorite playground in the whole world.

Her really, reliable recall success tells me we can conquer her other foibles; the aforementioned greetings, perfect stays both in drop and sit (so hard when you're a fidgeter), great household behavior (no counter surfing, doorbell spazzing, or racing through doorways ahead of her person).

Fostering and training Belle will always be one of the top five highlights of my life - and one of the things for which I am most proud. As far as graduating in the fall goes, as my husband used to say, "it's just a timing difference".

Great Expectations

On Tuesday, I spent time with Team Training at Helping Paws. Team Training is the period just before graduation where the graduating dogs and their new partners learn how to become a partnership.

It being the first week of Team Training, there is a lot of "lecture" as well as lab (and golden) time. Listening to the instructors describe the methods used to train the dogs, I found myself wishing I could audit the class. Just sit and listen and reabsorb all the lessons learned and shared with our upcoming graduates.

I've been thinking about "expectation" - something that each of the instructors touched on during the course of their presentations. Specifically, how to communicate the expected performance of a cue given to the dog. For example, one of the hardest things I've had to train myself NOT to do, is repeat a cue when Belle doesn't immediately respond. The reasons behind her delay in responding may vary - the cue was given in a confusing manner, i.e. sitdrop. The dog, reasonably enough, is probably asking, "which is it - sit or drop"? Sometimes, she's distracted. Sometimes, either she or me is just on our "C" game. Whatever the reason, it's easy to repeat the cue. The problem is, the dog begins to expect that repetition - and yes, dogs can count. Before you know it, the dog doesn't even think about performing the cue until you've gotten to the third or fourth or whatever repetition it is where your voice now means business.

Lowering the binoculars and looking at "expectation" from a macro perspective is even more intriguing. What is my overall expectation of my partnership with my dog? Is it an expectation of trust? Of uncertainty? Does it vary depending on our location or activity?

The answer to the last question is key to understanding the struggles Belle and I are having with her behavior at home - specifically, when visitors arrive. In public, I've always had the highest expectations for Belle's behavior. I'm focused on her and our partnership together. At home, I'm much more distracted. More focused on "doing my thing". Belle has responded accordingly - and true to her exuberant personality, with pure Tigger enthusiasm. Unfortunately, most people are like Rabbit and just don't appreciate the "bouncy, pouncy, full of fun, fun, fun" result.

The answer is the easy part, however. The real work is in figuring out how to change my expectations and communicate the new world order to her. Any suggestions?

Graduate Guru

HP Dogs seem to be a favorite topic these days for the local newspapers. HP graduates, Terry and Yuki, were the subject of a feature by Paul Dols of the Forest Lake News. He even included a video of Terry and Yuki working together.

In the video, Yuki is shown doing many of the cues that Belle is learning. The neatest thing of all though, is the enthusiasm she shows as she's working for Terry. Occasionally, Belle and I will encounter folks that have the notion that service dogs never get to play. The thing is, Yuki and other service dogs still get their regular "play" time, at least in the sense that these humans mean. What they don't comprehend and what the video shows perfectly is how Yuki makes her work her play as well. Can you imagine what we humans could accomplish if we performed our jobs with as much joy and enthusiasm as Yuki?
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Do(g)h!

If there's anything that proves the arrogance of the human species it's our ability to dismiss the astounding capabilities of animals as simply stimulus/response.

The March, 2008 National Geographic cover article "Inside Animal Minds" recaps recent scientific research with birds, dogs, apes, and even sheep demonstrating that diverse animal groups have significant cognitive abilities hitherto considered exclusive to human intelligence. The ability to understand and use language and symbols to communicate has been well documented in the research yet too often the results are dismissed outright, labeled anecdotal, or my personal favorite - results in a revised definition of what constitutes communication.

Anyone with a dog knows how well they can communicate with us. Anyone with a dog knows how they can problem solve to get what they want or need. Anyone with a dog knows their capacity for love and affection. But knowing it and proving it are vastly different things in the scientific community. I contend they are trying to prove the wrong premise. The question is not whether intelligence is an exclusively human trait, or even whether human intelligence is superior to nonhuman intelligence. The real question is how can we use these creatures unique skills and intelligence to enhance our own in a mutually beneficial arrangement. The proof? Belle and the countless service and guide dogs that each day perform big and little miracles for the humans they love and serve.

Leader Of The Pack

Lu here, I've decided to wrest the keyboard from Belle's paws for today.

I recently returned from a trip to Miami courtesy of the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation. There were a lot of special moments in the brief four day trip, but one of the real highlights, for me at least, was it was a true vacation. I wasn't responsible for anything but getting myself to the designated spot at the appointed time. Alex from CCFA took care of our flight, our food, our hotel, and our transportation. The team nature of the trip took care of our cameraderie. Without any logistical worries to bog us down, it was easy to bond with each other.

Life is so much easier when someone else is in charge - and performs their role perfectly.

Now I'm home and I'm the one this team of mine looks to to be in charge. They want to believe that they will always have adequate food, a warm place to sleep, and yes, the joy of knowing that they are loved. They want the freedom that comes from knowing and trusting that someone else is in charge. In return, if I do my job right, they willingly do all that I ask. If I don't do it right, Belle at least, will take matters in to her own hands.

This morning's walk had me thinking about my leadership with Belle. I asked myself if I'm her "Alex". I had to honestly answer, no. I don't always give her the sense that I'm in control.

Belle has always had phenomenal skills. She is a quick learner and will work hard to figure out a new problem. Behavior is a different matter. Some days, she'll be calm and on task. At other times, she's willful, disobedient, and obnoxious. Yesterday, was one of the willful days.

We were playing the Alien game described below, but Belle simply refused to bring the ball back to me. In the past, this behavior has really frustrated me. Yesterday, I did something different. I went inside, got a high value treat and Belle's leash, and called her to me. She came because the lure of the peanut butter was too much for her to resist. She also brought Alien - bonus points for me.

After her gentle leader was in place, I returned to playing Alien with Cody. At first, I had her sit at heel next to me while Cody demonstrated to her how the game was played. After several Cody retrieves, I asked her to "Get" and "Bring" Alien to me after Cody had dropped it at my feet. Of course, the first couple of times I asked her to do this, she tried to ignore me. The leash made it possible for me to remind her I was in charge. We played this game for another half hour or so, and then in the house we went. I never let her off lead once she made it clear that she didn't want to play the game by my rules. Today, we'll repeat the game, but with one important change - she will start out on lead. I'll make it easy for her to know where and when she needs to be and do.

Shape Up or Ship Out

I'm tired of waiting for Lu to have time to enter my stories into cyberspace, so I'm going to take matters into my own paws. After all, I am a wonder dog.

Where to begin, hmmmm? I think I'll start with my evaluation. Way back in December, I went to stay with N., the foster home coordinator for Helping Paws. I was supposed to be evaluated, but I thought it was a vacation! I met her gorgeous black labs, and her great cats, and I thought I'd died and gone to doggy heaven! All these great playmates, new smells, new people (I love new people best!). And then, horror of horrors, a crate! And I had to go in it, and stay, and not whine, or bark, or chase cats, or walk up to any human for scritches. How humiliating. I let everyone know how abused I felt - and they weren't pleased. See, service dogs are supposed to have great crate behavior. I say, how can I be of service if I'm in the crate?

The good news is (as everyone would expect), I'm fabulous at my service dog skills. I just have a TINY issue with a few LITTLE things. I have a really great really reliable recall - when I want to. I can be calm when people come to the door, but it's just so much more fun to show them how much I really love them. N. told me barreling in to folks isn't fun for the people - and could even be dangerous. Needless to say, Lu has a lot to answer for. She better find a way to make this crate and barrel stuff palatable or I may be looking at a career change. She better shape up or ship out, I say. There's no way that I'm gonna have a career change. That's HP's nice way of phrasing Service Dog Flunkie!

Evaluation - Part II

In anticipation of pre-matching with potential partners, Belle left Monday for her second evaluation. The house is so quiet without her.

It's hard to believe that eight months have passed since Belle strutted her stuff for Lori - her first evaluator. I feel like we've made both great progress and none at all. Greetings and people are still Belle's greatest challenge. When Nancy arrived to pick her up for her evaluation, she wriggled and barked and spazzed and acted just like she did as a two month old puppy. Holding her back from a full out assault on Nancy took more strength than it should have.

I know Nancy will find her highly skilled. I know she will see some definite improvement in Belle's recall. But Thanksgiving taught me that I need to give Belle many more opportunities to meet and greet people on her home turf. We had a house full of people on Thanksgiving. Both Belle and Cody did great with all the hoopla and food, but while Cody was allowed free roam, I kept Belle tethered to me or to Molly the whole day. It was the only way I could be sure that she wouldn't make mistakes - either in her enthusiasm to give kisses, or in passing the hors d'oeuvre trays without helping herself.

I know what Belle needs - practice. But that means I will have to step out of my introvert ways and invite more people, more often to come and visit us. I can do it.

Stimulating Work Environments

At Team Training on Tuesday, one of the foster mom's made a comment that I've thought about all week. She talked about how it seemed that her dog would sometimes give her "the look" when she asked him to get something. The look that seems to say, "you can do it, get it yourself!" As a parent of a teenager - and a teenage dog, I'm very familiar with that look.

Belle is at the point in her training where she knows every command I've taught her. The trouble is, when I work with her on her cue repetitions I'm often asking her to do the cue in the course of her work, not mine. And I have a niggling doubt that as such, I'm not preparing her as well as I could for how to do the cue in the world at large. The comment that the other foster mom expressed made me think about how and what I should adapt in the home so that Belle is working her cues - but in more of the way she will need to work them when she graduates. How do I make myself not do things that she should be doing?

I'm not sure what the answer is, but am wide open to suggestions - readers?

Team Training Part II

Teaching is a gift.

Allowing someone the time to practice and learn for themselves - priceless.

Team Training

Belle and I volunteered to assist in our first Team Training session on Tuesday. Belle received some much needed practice in kennel behavior, while I saw first hand how newly placed service dogs and their partners begin their journey together.

What an amazing experience.

A comment that one of the humans in training made, sent me back to the first weeks of working with Belle. She related how she felt she knew so little about how best to work with the dog. The thought she expressed was of the uncertainty she felt in this brave new venture. Oh, how I could relate to that. I came home from our first class together and told Molly Belle was the poster pup for pitiful foster homes. I had had such hopes for our first class, too!

Belle and I had done all our homework, and we'd learned all the first week skills. I headed off to class feeling confident in what we'd accomplished. But I arrived after many of the other puppies. Belle heard their puppy barks and all she could focus on was playing with her litter mates again. It would be my first lesson in foster home humility - and the importance of arriving early to give Belle her best chance to focus. The class was spent with Belle pulling so hard on her leash her gags, chokes, and heavy breathing at times drowned out Eileen's instructions to us. I remember feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, dumb and perplexed. I envied the ease with which my classmates worked with their pups.

I imagine that some of these new teams have had some thoughts like that this week.

My advice to them is don't worry - your partnership won't happen overnight. The two of you will never stop learning together. Remember your successes - and allow them to give you the confidence you will need to work through the inevitable times when frustration sets in. Remember too, sometimes it's just best to do what I saw Claudia and Koda do when both were confused as to how best to communicate with each other. They were working on M & M's and Koda did a "my lap" instead of a "side". Claudia repeated the cue for side and Koda just stayed on her lap. I know both were frustrated - but Claudia did something unexpected and unexpectedly wonderful. She asked Koda to snuggle - and he did. It was a golden moment for both of them.

Building Bridges

Belle and I took a trip to Illinois this week. On the way, we met many folks, both two and four-legged, in Minnesota, Iowa and Illinois. We didn't just pass through their towns as anonymous travelers. We couldn't. In her inimitable way, Belle begs people to say hello. To talk to us. To connect.

From gas stations, to restaurants, to waiting rooms, to sidewalks; every where we went we saw nothing but smiles on the faces of those we passed. If eye contact was made, a conversation was sure to follow.

I thought a lot about Belle's gift on the way home. Her connection to and with others really helped make the long ride bearable. I thought about it again when I read a two day old newspaper this morning and came across an editorial titled A Thousand Ways To Disconnect, And Now A Hugging Ban, Too written by Leonard Pitts, a Pulitzer Prize winning columnist. Mr. Pitts was lamenting the most recent way we humans are trying to sanitize our relationships - going so far as to ban hugs between schoolchildren.

How sad!

No, Mr. Pitts - you are not the only one who feels this is a troubling trend. As someone who has been desperately grateful for the many hugs my children have received from classmates, teachers, school officials and others over the past few years, I'm appalled. I don't doubt that there are those that engage in "bad hugging". But to eliminate all hugging strikes me as a far greater form of abuse.

When I realize it takes being with Belle to make myself and others open to each other, I'm saddened for all the neat people I may never get to meet. We need each other to survive in this world. Sometimes that's a messy business. Belle doesn't care. She gently rests her head on my shoulder, stills herself, stands quietly and just lets me hold her. I hope the day will never come that we humans can't or won't do the same.